😀🎁🤗

It's my Beautiful princesses birthday today she's 6. Wow time has flown it doesn't seem that long since i watched my daughter bring her into this world. That was such a surreal experience. The love i felt the second i saw her was unreal and the protectiveness knowing she's the most important person in my baby girls life i can't even explain it. My 2 Grandchildren give me my strengh to get out of bed each morning i love them so much 🤗
Well i got dressed today haha and took madams presents up to her before she goes out for her day of fun. She loved them. I suprised her with a present and card for her doll lily aswell from the both of us 😂 because apparently it's her birthday too.  She was very excited about that.

Fuck
I'm such an arsehole of all times not to take my meds!! I hate that i get this way that i i can't even do a simple thing as pick up my tablets and then have to start again. I'm useless i can see what I'm doing to myself but i can't stop it. I make progress then i stumble back even further and now I'm rambling.
Last night was a tough one. One of the toughest yet i think! Every time i started to relax I'd drift back to them final moments and that excruciating pain keeps sneaking up on me I'm sure hourly Today. I really want to curl up in a ball and rip my hair out and scream but i know i need to absorb it all and be strong. It's our princesses birthday tomorrow you would of been bouncing around with excitement ready for her and say you can't believe she's going to be 6. You'd be so proud of her. She talks about you every day still her Uncle Jay's girl bless.

A True Face

No matter what only the face your born with matters thats whats really attatched to your true mind. It does matter what anyone thinks as long as your always honest about who you really are in in your heart thats your true face the one your born with. I always taut my kids be honest about who you are never be ashamed of your true self and that is where each and every one of them have always done me Proud! No matter what they do or have done they have never pretended to be anyone other than their true selves and never expected anyone to be anyone other than their true selves! One face one body one soul.